Dear Baby Bear,

Congratulations to us! We are now 1/3 the way done with this pregnancy. The months seems to be creeping by, but the weeks actually fly by. I love looking on my baby apps to find out how big you are getting and what new tricks you have learned. For example, this week they say that you can suck your thumb! Soooo cute!!!

This week we heard your heartbeat for the first time.  It took a little while for the nurse to find it. I can't lie, it made me a little nervous. But after lots of ultrasound gel on my stomach and patient waiting, we finally found it! It was so neat to hear!

You are about the size of an avocado this week.  And, my little avocado, you are still my go-to excuse for not wanting to grade anything. Haha. I leave work with the best of intentions, but I am still feeling so exhausted after a long day. Andrew teases me a little because I can often be found on the couch at 6:30 in the afternoon, fast asleep. Then he will wake me up around 9ish and help shuffle me to our bedroom. He gives me my nausea medicine, tucks me in, and I fall fast asleep again. So grading will have to wait another day. 

The next day, we had some friends and family over at our house to celebrate my birthday, during the evening, we did a gender reveal. You are a .....GIRL!!!!

Not going to lie, I definitely thought you were going to be a boy. But my little mama heart burst and I started crying when I found out you were a girl. I was soooo thrilled. 

​Your daddy made me cry (good tears) when he bought you an adorable onesie that says "Mommy is my bestie." The glitter bow just pushed me over the edge as I started to imagine our little friendship and how I will love dressing you up in girly attire. 

The nausea comes and goes now. Some days I think, "Finally! I am done feeling so sick!" and then other days I find myself practically living near a trashcan or toilet.  

Actually, more than the nausea, my lower back has been the new center of negative attention. I've found that if I sit too much, my back starts screaming at me. Time to start going to a chiropractor. 

Merry Christmas, Baby Bear! We spent Christmas with my family in California this year.

I think my favorite gifts I received had to do with you: a pink bear binky, a snugly warm bear outfit, a beautiful swaddle, a necklace that says "baby bear" on it, some cute booties and a few frilly bows.

And this week I have officially accepted the fact that I am definitely growing a belly. Bring on the pregnancy pants!

We drove back to Utah after our Christmas vacation, and I have to say, it was the worst day of pregnancy by far! On our road trip, I threw up 5 times (plus once right before we left California, and another time when we were back home in Utah). A total of 7 times in one day! Not only that, but throwing up usually causes me to pee my pants (probably TMI, but I just have to be real about it). 

So a 10-hour road trip + pregnancy + 5x throwing up + 3x changing of clothes + crying uncontrollably because I felt so embarrassed and ugly = 1 very unhappy pregnant woman who was ever so grateful for a patient and very loving husband who insisted that he still thought she was beautiful.  Yeah...Gracey and I are very blessed to have Andrew around. 

Despite all that, we celebrated the New Year with Andrew's family this week. We are so excited for all the new adventures that await us in 2018.

Aloha! We went on a babymoon to the beautiful island of Kauai. It started out rough (I wont go into details here about our terrible flight on Alaska Airlines), but once we arrived the rest of the week was pure paradise. I loved spending some relaxing time with Andrew as we explored the island (by car and by helicopter), soaked up the sun, and snorkeled. We even went to Oahu for a day and explored Peal Harbor, the North Shore, the Laie LDS Temple, the Polynesian Culture Center, and Waikiki. (It was one jam-packed day). The week was pure bliss, and both Andrew and I felt rejuvenated.  

Baby Bear,

Your Daddy was able to feel you move this week! It was so exciting! For the past 2 weeks or so, I have been able to feel you wiggle around in my belly. Usually you get really squirmy when I am eating. While we were in Hawaii, I tried to get Andrew to feel you move, but I guess your kicks weren't strong enough yet. This week however, you wiggled around as I lay in bed. Andrew put his hand on my belly, and his eyes lit up when you moved.

"Was that her?!" he asked with wide eyes.   Yes, it was. And since then he has felt you quite a bit. While I personally have felt a unique connection to you for a long time, I think this interaction between you and your Daddy made it feel more real for him. I am so happy to share this pregnancy with Andrew. He is already such a great "Papa Bear", and he loves to talk to you through my belly and tell you how excited he his to meet you. 

Baby Bear,

This month's doctor's visit included the gestational diabetes test.  Lucky me, I got poked more times than I like since they couldn't seem to find my veins, but its all worth it as long as you keep growing healthy.  I passed the diabetes test, and looks like you are growing just as you should be. 

Today Andrew said something about meeting you in 3 months, and all of a sudden it hit me....I AM 6 MONTHS PREGNANT!?  WE ARE GOING TO HAVE A BABY IN OUR HOME IN ONLY 3 MONTHS!?   In some ways, the time goes by so fast.  Now I am discussing baby showers with my mom and nursery wall ideas with Andrew. I used to think, "Oh, we have so much time for all that."  But now I realize that you will join our lives a lot quicker than I was expecting. It fills me with excitement and nerves all at the same time.

People have been asking me how I feel, and as I have thought about my response, I have definitely noticed that I feel less sick and more energized. Even Andrew said yesterday, "I am glad you are past the nausea stage." Yes! Me too!...and then suddenly, only a few hours after his comment, I got sick on our way home from Park City, and I threw up (literally) all over myself and Andrew's car. It came on so suddenly, I didn't have a baggie, and we were stuck in traffic so Andrew had a hard time pulling over to the side of the road. It was another low, low, low point for me!  Needless to say, I was mortified. I came home, dumped my clothes in the wash, took a shower, and then looked up "How to clean up throw up from a car" on the internet. Well, I guess Andrew and I are getting ready for parenthood one nasty situation at a time. 

Ok, I can't end the Second Trimester Baby Bear diaries on a low, nasty note. So let's end with my first baby-bump picture EVER! (I know, it's a little pathetic that I haven't been documenting the growing bump, but I figure the third trimester is where it is going to grow the most).

Speaking of that, WE ARE STARTING THE THIRD TRIMESTER!!!! Oh my gosh, this pregnancy seems to have flown by (although, many people warn me that the third trimester sometimes seems to move at a snail's pace while I wait for my Gracey Bear to arrive). 

This pregnancy, with all its ups and downs, really has been a beautiful adventure. I love how animated Andrew gets as he feels Grace move inside my belly, and I love the personal connection I feel with her when I am able just to sit down and focus on the way she squirms and pokes inside me. I love the tender moments when Andrew puts his face close to my stomach to talk to Grace and tell her how excited he is to meet her. I love the support and excitement of my friends, family, and coworkers who light up as they see my baby belly. And I love how close Andrew and I have gotten as we have discussed the upcoming changes and how parenthood will completely change our lives. We are definitely eagerly anticipating Grace's arrival and cant believe it is only 3 short months away!

**Note- I actually wrote this post on Jan. 7! And now, a month later, I am FINALLY posting it. That is so ridiculous. haha. This is especially ironic since the first goal I mention in this post is that I want to be better at blogging. :)  

Hello, 2018!

With a new year, comes new opportunities for self-improvement and progression. This year, I hope to improve my blogging regularity. Even if it is just a quick note, I hope to keep a better record of what is going on in our lives from week to week. 

So far, I feel like I have started 2018 a little bit sluggishly. Many of my Christmas decorations are still up, and I have been feeling pretty lazy when it comes to house-cleaning.

This brings me to my other resolutions. I want to do little things every day to help me in the following departments:

• healthy and physical wellbeing
• cleanliness and organization in my home
• spirituality

Pregnancy has definitely taken its toll on me. There were months where NOTHING sounded appetizing and I felt weak and lethargic after work. No, I have not binged on a gallon of ice cream or , but I know that I can also do better when it comes to my eating and exercise habits. 

So my goal is just to do little things throughout the day to help my body feel healthier and happier. These include:

• trying to eat more clean foods (Andrew wants to do Whole 30 again, and I want to support him in this. I know we both feel much better when we clean up our eating habits).
• do mini exercise routines  (ex: walking in the morning before work, squats while watching a TV show, stretch/yoga before bed to help strengthen my back)

I love a clean home. I love the feeling of just being able to relax in an organized environment. It is like a breath of fresh air.

However, I am not naturally an organized person. I tend to leave things out, and then they start to pile up. It is definitely a weakness of mine that I am very much aware of. But, awareness is the first step to improvement, and now I want to proactively work on my organization skills. 

To be honest, I still need to figure out exactly how I plan on tackling this goal. I know that there are lists of suggestions on Pinterest and other internet sites. They suggest things like: clean one part of your house every day (ex: Monday is the kitchen, Tuesday is the living room, etc.). I also think I just need to work on putting things away in the moment rather than leaving things out.   Anyway, this will be a work in progress, but I know it is only going to get harder as our family grown, so I want to work on improving our home cleanliness now.

This is a little bit of a tough one for me to talk about, but I feel like I have been in a spiritual slump for the past little while. I know that as I improve my relationship with Heavenly Father, that will in turn improve so many other aspects of my life (ex: my relationship with my husband, my confidence in my job and in my future as a mother, daily peace and direction, etc.). I know this goal starts with the simple things:

• buy a temple dress (that fits my pregnant body) so that Andrew and I can go to the temple monthly
• read scriptures as a couple (we used to be so good at this, and I always loved it)
• have more meaningful conversations/prayers with my Heavenly Father

No rocket science here. I know what I need to do, now I just need to get up and do it. I know the spirit will immediately bless me if I push myself to be a little more spiritually aware.